How To Listen To Your Heart Without Losing Your Mind

how to listen to your heart

“Some people will follow their minds without listening to their hearts, and others will follow their hearts without listening to their minds. This is why reason exists, for there to be balance between the heart and mind. We were not meant to follow the mind and ignore the heart. Instead, we were meant to follow the heart over the mind, but without completely abandoning logic. The middle way is the preferred way, and this path simply means to allow your heart to drive you, but do not forget to balance reason with your conscience.”
Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem


I have a huge problem with many of the teachings of the spiritual community. “Listen to your heart. The mind is the enemy.”, they say. “Work on opening your higher chakras. The lowers ones are less evolved. Suppress your desires. They are the enemy.”

I am here to tell you. It is unwise to suppress any part of you. You were given every part of you as a gift to help you live life. We give our power away by listening to someone’s else’s formula (does that sound like listening to your heart?), and we wind up suffering in the process. It actually amazes me that we are told so often to silence our minds, when our entire world is projected by the mind. Mind moves around the sense of self.

When you suppress your desires, they will always come out in an unhealthier way. Ever said no to that scoop of ice cream you were craving, and wind up eating an entire box of cookies later?  Those people with the blocked lower chakras? They are the ones living life ungrounded, wondering why they can’t manifest anything. (When your lower chakras are blocked, there’s nothing connecting you to earth, so how can you manifest anything on it?)

And, those people who only listen to their heart and ignore their minds? They are the ones living from every feeling and emotion they have, with nothing else guiding them. They often make unwise, emotionally charged decisions, instead of letting their mind sometimes tell them they aren’t being very rational. They are the ones calling you to bum money because they spent the money for their rent on some bauble they just had to have. They are the ones who quit their day job to do what they loved without a thought as to how they would bring in income from it. They are the ones that end up in relationship after relationship because they were in “love”, but didn’t stop to use their mind to see if the relationship was actually a wise decision.

It doesn’t matter how much two people love one another if they are developmentally incompatible, or if there is not a shared willingness to become conscious. This is why they call it a relationship instead of a loveship. Love alone is not enough. If you want it to last, you have to relate to each other in ways that keep the ship afloat.-Jeff Brown


We were given both a head and a heart for a reason. While it’s important to have an open heart, this doesn’t mean that we let it control our every decision. We also don’t want to only make our decisions based on logic. If we leave our heart out of the picture, we also won’t be very happy. We will wind up in a job we hate, dreading Mondays, or in a loveless relationship because it made sense to our head. Here are tips on how to follow your heart while also letting your mind guide you.

How To Listen To Your Heart Without Losing Your Mind

how to listen to your heart

1. Listen To Both Your Intuition And Your Fears

Are heart is what gives us that initial desire for something. Our heart provides the excitement and inspiration to make something happen. But, many people don’t make it past there. They either let the mind control them with fear and stop, or they don’t use their mind to make a plan to work on their dreams. If you don’t look at your fears, they will stay stuck in your body, and you will eventually become stuck. Your mind is only trying to protect you. Look at your mind’s concerns and address them.

Fear can be overcome, but it also may cause you to make a wiser choice. You may decide to date someone casually for a while to see how the relationship progresses before getting involved in a more serious relationship. Or, you may do your dream job part-time while keeping your full-time job to pay the bills. Listen to your intuition, and pay attention to the other parts of your body. Do you have a knot in your stomach that won’t go away? Figure out what your body is trying to tell you and why.

2. Do Things To Calm The Body And Mind

We live in a frantic world where it’s always easy to be on the go, and that causes us to ignore both our hearts and minds. When we calm our bodies and our minds, the true voice of the heart can break through. I like to do this by taking a walk in nature, taking a long bath, getting a massage, or listening to calming music. In fact, I love to start my morning with exercises to relax. Five Good Minutes is a great book filled with relaxation exercises that only take five minutes.

3. Don’t Let Others Make Your Decisions For You

how to listen to your heart

We often ask others (others who usually don’t even have their own shit together) for advice, and then we let that advice dictate our decisions. That is the absolute worse thing you can do. When you have to go to others for advice, that means you are very disconnected from your own heart and intuition. In fact, you aren’t even using your mind to help you decided what to do. Go inside and figure out a path for yourself. Listen to your heart, and let your mind guide you. You need to live your own life and not the life of another.

 4. Take Life Less Seriously

listen to your heart

We are so hard on ourselves. You don’t have to be perfect. You are allowed to make mistakes. The great thing is, you can always start again. I know some of the “mistakes” I’ve made have been some of the greatest gifts. My mistakes have often led me to places I wouldn’t have wound up otherwise. Realize that sometimes in life, you may go down a path you would have rather not have walked down, but only that path will lead you to the place you need to be. Have more fun in life, and listen to its flow.

5. Get Outside Of Your Comfort Zone

Often, we ignore our hearts because we think they are irrational, but some of the fears of the mind can be just as irrational. Don’t let the fears of the mind keep you from fully living life because you aren’t fully comfortable. Remember, the heart provides us with an authentic connection to who we are inside, and we can use the mind to guide us to take the right steps to live fully. To me, using both the head and the heart is a bit like deciding where to go on your dream trip. You don’t let the mind talk you out of not going because of all the bad things that could happen. You let your heart decide where to go, and your mind gets involved with figuring out how much money to save for the trip, what to pack, and the planning aspects. You use your mind to do the research, and your heart gets to be the one to dream up the adventure.

Do you struggle with making decisions?

Do you listen to your heart or your mind, but want help doing both? 

If you are looking for mentoring, guidance, or a game plan to create the life you want, I can help. 

I help with: 

• Finding and living your passions
• Living life on your own terms
• Loving yourself
• Better relationships
• Navigating big transitions
• Career changes and decisions
• Financial issues
• Business issues
• Starting a new business (business and financial plans and strategies)
• Starting and running a successful blog
• Managing stress
• Being happy

Email me at [email protected] for a phone mentoring session today. 

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  1. Agree to face and accept your fears. That is the only way they will dissolve. Of course, more will come along so it is like a rinse and repeat tactic.

  2. Great tips, especially getting out of your comfort zone. Using your mind and heart together and allowing yourself to embrace something new will produce an amazing life experience.

  3. Great post! Maybe now that you have moved to Hawaii you will find the peace of mind to write here even more inspirational posts.

  4. Bernadette Aijima

    🙁 Im at serious depression. I feel worthless. Hope I could follow your advices

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